In what way was this necessary?
I wished that I could magically have the commenter spend some time with Alexander McCall Smith's Isabel Dalhousie.
But it was so easy, thought Isabel. It was so easy dealing with people who were well-mannered...They knew how to exchange those courtesies which made life go smoothly, which was what manners were all about.....
Good manners depended on paying moral attention to others; it required one to treat them with complete moral seriousness, to understand their feelings and their needs. Some people, the selfish, had no inclination to do this, and it always showed. They were impatient with those they thought did not count...manners were the basic building block of civil society.Alexander McCall Smith
The Lost Art of Gratitude
If you've never read the very pleasant McCall Smith's Isabel Dalhousie novels set in modern day Edinburgh, you're in for a treat.
Isabel's very handsome boyfriend Jamie, many years her junior, becomes her husband by the time you get to later books in the series.
And that is sometimes the reward for a well-mannered brilliant lady such as Isabel!
What's a post without a picture, so here is what I think Isabel might look like if you updated the woman in this portrait by Holman Hunt for today's woman...
Jamie--her Jamie--said this about Isabel in The Lost Art of Gratitude: